Rice Pudding and Non-Prevent Peeing: Leandra’s Pregnant Style Week Diary


eight:10 a.m.

I’m up! Once more! And need to pee! Once more! For the 7th time! Due to the fact! 10 p.m. remaining night time! However who’s counting? These days is ~my day~ to execute an outfit recipe on Guy Repeller’s Instagram account however I need to be a bit strategic approximately how I do that as a result of I’m now not leaving house till like, eleven a.m., and feature a gathering right here from nine:forty five to ten:forty five, and quarter-hour isn’t sufficient time to bankroll a whole tale, in particular while it takes quarter-hour to place on socks, g-dang it, so, will have to I pretend it?

eight:35 a.m.

I’m faking it, and thus far have already fulfilled 4 — rely them, 4 — tales. Granted, one used to be of my rest room, however that may be a sacred seat in this day and age, I’ll have you recognize.

nine:20 a.m.

Tale whole, and when you ignored it, I placed on clothes: one incorporated a wool leopard coat with leggings and shoes and a turtleneck, and the opposite incorporated black knit pants and any other turtleneck (additionally black) with a sleeveless trench coat and the similar shoes from the primary lewk. Because it became out, I wore neither of those appears. I did put on this, despite the fact that. I’m actually hungry, btw.

nine:30 a.m.

Don’t fear, I’ve already toasted slices of Ezekiel toast and now I’m lathering them with the is still of a big vat of almond butter that I will not consider took Abie simply weeks to finish. This factor is actually a vat folks — so rattling massive. Like a liter and a part of water, however in almond butter. I desire I have been consuming a cookie.

nine:forty five a.m.

Assembly time! However first, I’ve to pee.

10:forty five a.m.

I actually do not know what we simply mentioned. I will be able to’t even keep in mind that my very own identify — both I want a espresso, being pregnant mind is an actual factor, or those footwear are tied on too tight and I will have to amendment once more or no less than put on extra smart shoes. Sure, shoes are a greater concept. I’m going to place on shoes.

eleven:forty five a.m.

I simply arrived at Rosie Assoulin’s presentation; that is the primary type week adventure I’ve attended all week and I feel I forgot how one can socialize. I noticed the gathering over the weekend once I stopped via Rosie’s studio for fittings so I’m more or less now not taking a look on the garments although it needs to be stated, those are probably the most pleased clothes in the market; the colours, the crystals, the best way they’re built are actually for a lady who needs to have a laugh together with her wears. <– See that sentence? That’s how you realize I haven’t been at style week. It used to be empty and dull and I intended the whole thing I stated however did you are feeling it on your guts? I feel now not.

12:15 p.m.

My family member Nasiba is dressed in this lovable gold Chanel barrette in her hair. Ruthie Friedlander had a adorable one in ultimate September all through type week which, when you understand that, made it into this very tale archetype. It seems that, there’s a massive arsenal of them occupying eBay, so I’m going to get on that shit later this night however now I’ve to go to the place of business as a result of I’ve a decision at 1 p.m.

12:forty five p.m.

I’m so satisfied I wore shoes — that are meant to were a few 15-minute stroll however as an alternative it used to be nearer to 30. I’m going to leave out wearing round this superior 30-pound weight in weeks. I’m now not being sarcastic.

I’m wondering how temporarily I will be able to order lunch and pee once more sooner than I’ve to get on my 1 p.m. name. I hit up Caviar, seek for Dimes and make a selection the salmon lunch unique and upload a troublesome boiled egg and avocado as a result of wholesome fat and protein, other folks! My family member Elizabeth is sure that her daughter is a genius as a result of she overdosed on omega three’s a.okay.a. salmon whilst she used to be pregnant. I’m now not essentially looking to impose genius on my youngsters (they’re who they’re and I really like them besides!), however you understand, if I will be able to lend a hand them with their pursuit of diplomas from Princeton, why now not?

1:35 p.m.

I remember that the whole thing approximately that decision! That is in all probability the signal of a just right dialog? We’re hiring for like, 5 roles at Guy Repeller lately so nearly all of my time at the present time is spent vetting applicants and this bizarre factor occurs to me prior to each and every unmarried interview or assembly the place I aggravating up and my ass cheeks clench and my center is going black and I think like, Why am I certified to try this? Allow me are living! Allow me write! Then I pop out of the assembly feeling like, I in reality like speaking to other folks! And this vicious cycle repeats itself over and over again.

1:forty five p.m.

Meals’s right here! I’ve to pee.

1:fifty three p.m.

Meals’s long past. Do you wish to have to peer what’s taking place at my table? On it there are a few new issues: the invite to Calvin Klein’s display, that is a bag of popcorn (are we going to the theater, or what?), the invite to Marc Jacobs, which is going on the next day to come night time at 6 p.m., a couple of huge sun shades that learn DG through, you guessed it, Dolce & Gabbana, and 2 superior crystal jewelry via the aforementioned Calvin Klein that I’m one hundred% going to put on this night. one hundred% I inform you! I want ice cream.

2:35 p.m.

We now have a actually fucking fun adventure bobbing up in April and I’m days at the back of on writing the intro letter for the development so I simply completed that, which I think nice approximately, and now am much more convicted in my considering that I want ice cream, so right here’s what I’m going to do: I’ve some other assembly with any other candidate at three p.m. within the East Village. I’m going to stroll over there and prevent at Van Leeuwen on my means. K, simply provide me a minute to rise up and placed on my coat and pee.

2:forty five p.m.

Replace: I were given Rice to Riches rice pudding as an alternative. Oreo flavored.

three:fifty five p.m.

Candidate assembly #2, whole! There’s a display subsequent door. The dressmaker is in fact a collective referred to as Vaquera and I’m lovely keen to peer what they have got up their sleeve for the season. The logo feels way more conceptual; means much less concerning the garments, a lot more concerning the implication of the choices you are making while you duvet your individual in material. And that’s probably the most difficult sentence I’m intellectually able to sharing these days.

four:forty five p.m.

FYI, there used to be a retainer, the Intercourse and the Town topic track and an overly, very massive corduroy hat. I’ve to head house, I’m exhausted and, you recognize, want a rest room.

five:30 p.m.

It smells like lemon and frankincense and there’s classical track enjoying once I stroll into my rental. However nobody is right here. Abie will have to have simply come and long past. I’m going to take a look at to get nearly all of this Day in The Lifestyles written prior to the Calvin Klein display in order that while I am getting house from there, I will be able to shimmy directly into writing that. I’m almost certainly being delusional.

6:fifty four p.m.

If you are brooding about, because the time we remaining spoke, I’ve eaten a handful of nuts, slices of celery dipped in almond butter, medjool dates, a tablespoon of blackstrap molasses (and an iron complement), slices of halloumi cheese, an aspect order of Israeli salad and a work of banana bread. However what will have to I’ve for dinner! I will have to get started fascinated with getting up and going to the Calvin Klein display as a result of if I don’t rise up now, I will be able to rise up by no means.

7:31 p.m.

I was denims, introduced a couple of calf-duration boots (I will be able to’t inform if this used to be extremely dumb however I assume my again will allow me understand in a couple of mins once I get up!), placed on the ones bomb ass Calvin Klein jewelry, and is it simply me, or do my cheeks appear to be they ate themselves? I’m so pleased with them. And myself! I don’t assume I’ve been out of my rental this past due given that I moved in, which used to be in October.

eight p.m.

Right here I’m, at The American Inventory Trade, feeling relatively dubiously concerning the absurdly top quantity of popcorn permeating the bottom. It smells scrumptious and is crunching approximately and is suitable for eating and I’m wondering whether it is tricky that there’s exact meals at the floor. I used to be going to name it “nourishment,” however then I noticed there are 0 dietary advantages to consuming popcorn so we’ll move with “meals.”

eight:20 p.m.

I’m seated in a sandwich among Eva Chen, who’s telling me I most likely don’t want nipple cream, and Constance Jablonski, whose cow pores and skin pants are ruined from all of the popcorn at the flooring. There are these kind of cool parkas round me — a few Calvin Klein, a large number of Balenciaga — and it rings a bell in my memory that style week all the time has some way of burning a consumerist hollow in my pocket.

eight:forty five p.m.

That. Used to be. Insane. However I gained’t break it for you right here! Learn the evaluation!

nine:20 p.m.

Lol that I assumed I might be capable of write it once I were given house. Whether it is imaginable to sleep together with your eyes open, that’s what I’m doing presently. And! There’s a cracker with halloumi cheese in my mouth, FYI. I’m simply going to lather a few stretch mark oil onto my abdomen and follow a lavender very important oil to my chest and the arms of my hand, then I will be able to understand that I forgot to take my jewelry off, say “Shit,” listen Abie ask, “What? Are you in hard work?” Say, “No, I were given my jewelry all oily,” then hate myself for expressing this sort of sentence, and prior to you comprehend it, we’re each asleep.

Pictures by means of Leandra Medine Cohen. 

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